Dealing With Stress

To kick off our new section (Life Coach) , we’re going to give you tips on dealing with stress and everyday burdens. *Disclaimer* I’m not a licensed psychologist, but I do insult people that go to them. Please don’t take my recommendations seriously, if you do, you deserve whatever happens to your stupid self.

Just like the guy in the photo, everyday life can leave us feeling exhausted, frustrated, and stressed out. Fortunately, you have to help you get along. Here are some tips when dealing with stress.

    Have a few drinks everyday after work.

  • This usually helps me unwind. Don’t listen to doctors that say “drinking is bad and doesn’t relieve stress”. You know you chill out when you drink. Actually think back on all the times that good things happened to you while you were drunk…yeah remember that hottie you hooked up with at that bar? Well she wasn’t really hot, but you didn’t care did you? See…alcohol makes a bad situation better by lowering your inhibitions and freeing you from perceived mistakes. So drink up, if you need help deciding what to drink, please post in the comments section below.
  • Make fun and laugh at others

  • This is one of my favorites, I just love laughing at people not with them. When you’re feeling stressed out, just find something ridiculous about someone sitting in a cubicle near you and laugh. The trick is to have a joke in mind just in case that person notices you’re laughing at them. If they look over, just say “hey man I just remembered this joke, I thought you might like ” and that should get you by without incident.
  • Pick on someone of lesser size

  • When your day is just not going how it should, there is a simple solution. Pick on someone of lesser size. Okay don’t get ahead of yourselves here, I’m not advocating physical confrontation here, just psychological ones. For example, you’re pissed off at your boss because he just caught you pretending to be working while you were actually asleep (yeah you were doing the old phone on your shoulder against your head trick, problem is you started snoring). Okay so your feeling like a lesser person for being caught, so on your lunch break you go to the nearest fast food joint. While waiting in line at MCburger, make a snide remark about the employees, something like “hey those stupid cashiers sure are slow” say it loud enough for the people around you to hear but not the cashiers (you don’t want an extra order of spit do you). Saying something like this will immediately make you feel like the bigger person. Don’t worry if those around you don’t laugh, they’re just too scared to say it themselves, hence you are morally superior and stress free now.

Hopefully these quick tips will help you deal with some of the stresses we encounter in our daily lives.


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