The Enzyte Guy is the Anti-Christ

Not only is this idiot the most annoying thing I have ever seen on TV, it is also a scam. For the life of me I don’t know how this company is still doing business, even after all the lawsuits brought against them. Dude come on, if something really made your dick grow I doubt you would have to advertise it that much.

However, the issue here is not penis enlargement, no it is this man’s career. The “Enzyte guy” as he is known to his inner circle of friends and family will probably never find work again. Yes you heard me there is a systemic conspiracy propagated by the advertising company to destroy the “Enzyte guy’s” chances of ever finding work again. I did manage to get some inside sources in the advertising company to reveal further details of the plot. “We believe that the “Enzyte guy” is the anti-christ and we have been charged with the duty of seeing to it that after the Enzyte gig is up his career will be over.” Upon further questioning, my source revealed how this makes sense to any thinking person. “You see, what we have done is annoyed the public beyond belief with the Enzyte commercial featuring the “Enzyte guy”, that way when he truly begins his proselytizing as the beast himself no one will want to listen.” As I am sitting here listening to this bizarre story it all starts to fall into place.

The commercials aimed at vanity, sex, and coveting…all are sins. But I believe the anti-christ also known as the “Enzyte guy”, underestimated us and our patience for annoying commercials. As you could imagine there weren’t many commercials in hell where he came from, so he really didn’t understand the marketing psychology and demographics involved with advertising. The “Enzyte guy” also known as the anti-christ, thought he was getting a sweet deal when he got the job doing commercials for them. He probably thought to himself;”I will be in every TV in America and they will follow me into the depths of hell by way of a false promise to enlarge their penises.”

So there you have it, the truth exposed, would like to take credit for saving the world once again, this time from the evil grip of the anti-christ also known as the “Enzyte guy.”


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